MEN

Jokes on Men

(to all the
 women  to brighten their day)

What is the thinnest book in the world?
"What Men Know About Women"


What's the difference between men and government bonds?
Bonds mature


How do you save a man from drowning?
Take your foot off his head


What do men and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up


How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares


How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know... it has never happened


What's a man's idea of helping with the housework?
Lifting his leg so you can vacuum


What's the difference between a man and E.T?
E.T. phoned home


What does a man consider a seven course meal?
A hot dog and a six pack of beer


What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted !


What did God say after he created man?
I can do better


What are two reasons men don't mind their own business?
1. No mind 2. No business


What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist


Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal?
He bronzed it


How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy and wearable"


Only a man could buy a $400 car and put a $4000 stereo in it


Why did God create man?
He needed to practice


Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
When the crew gets lost, at least she will ask for directions 




Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?

MEN tal   illness

MEN strual   cramps

MEN tal   breakdown

MEN opause

GUY nocologist

AND 

When women have REAL trouble, it's a HISterectomy.