Law of Mechanical Repair
After your
hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll
have to pee.
Law of Gravity
Any tool, nut, bolt,
screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible
corner.
Law of Probability
The probability of
being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your
act.
Law of Random Numbers
If you dial a
wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always
answers.
Law of the Alibi
If you tell the boss
you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you
will have a flat tire.
Variation Law
If you change lines (or
traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are
in now
(works every time)
Law of the Bath
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone
rings.
Law of Close Encounters
The
probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with
someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result
When you try to
prove to someone that a machine won't work,
it will.
it will.
Law of Biomechanics
The severity of
the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theater
At any event, the
people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive
last.
The Starbucks Law
As soon as you sit
down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will
last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers
If there are
only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Logical Argument
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law of Physical Appearance
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they
will stop making it.
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they
will stop making it.
Doctors' Law
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
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